Thursday, November 16, 2006

He said to me gently, "let me!"

Reading Exodus for a week. Many will say why Pharoah be so stupid to fight with almighty God. It is so obvious that He is the Lord. Hardly realize that I am the same most of the time. There are many times I challenge God. I know he doesn't like but I say why not. I know he wants me to do something but I just don't want to give up. Like Pharoah didn't want to give up his labour and power. I know God wants to be the controller in me but I am not prepared to let him. Like Pharoah, I am the one in charge and I don't want to let Him.

Of course when Jesus died for me, I will not be punished like what Egyptian got. But for the consequence of my own sin, my own choice, I have to clean the mess myself. It takes longer and it's harder than what I expected. I am so fed up now.

Many times I told God, I am ready now. Let you be in charge. But then, I send my soldiers to chase the Israels to red sea. Although I don't understand when God said he made Pharoah's heart hard as stone, I believe as long as I cry for help, Jesus will support me, help me, give me strength to clean the mess and to fight the opposite voice inside of me.

Because God shows his gentle in this chapter. For He can kill Pharoah easy but he wanted to show him his almighty and let others know His name. For he kill all plants but the young wheat and spelt. For using heavy hail to kill Egyptians but giving a chance to those who trust and fear of him. He is a gentle God who loves us dearly as well as little plant. He loves his creations.

And because he loves me dearly no matter what and I have plenty of experience for that! And I pray for never stop giving me the courage to hang on, to live on, and not to give it up, not a second.......

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