Mother need to do the examination but she is escaping. She cried the other day and I hugged her. Her life is truly miserable not because of her experience, but the way she dealt with it. She had never let go of anything, anyone. I can almost felt her heavy heart. Only Jesus can save her. V and M is praying. I know I am the one to execute. God I really need courage, wisdom and faith to talk her through. Also, I need to be healed for all the hurt she did to me. I need to be brave and strong in Him.

A sunday morning, I was sitting in a cafe having bf, waiting to serve at church service. 2 tables away from mine, there are a family sitting. The mother is braiding daughter's hair that caught my attention. They looked alike and both no expression on the face. Suddenly, the comb went to her eye and she began to rub it. Mother annoyed and stopped. While waiting, she started combing her own hair. Little girl keep rubbing until she finished. Then she picked up her little sister's book playfully. Mother combed her hair again. To most people, this is nothing special. But I am attracted to the nature harmony. Never once, I felt so comfortable to be with my mother. With her touching or being served by her, I was always anxious or even panic. Perhaps I long for harmony with my mother. Not only her but all my friends and family. Perhaps this is what I am missing for my whole life to be complete!